To Dine or Dance?

So you've been scavenging through the dating sites. Tinder, OKC, HER. You've even tried that strange Coffee Meets Bagel and may or may not have forked out the money for a dreaded profile.

You've had the same "work for blah", "my hobbies are blah" conversation and then BAM. You finally get a steady flow of witty and thought provoking banter with a female you find attractive. Locating such a mystical creature in the metro area seems like a win all in itself, but now you actually have to make it through the sometimes awkward first date.

Paying attention to conversation, your girl is going to love one of two styles of dates.She's either a classic wine-and-dine-her kinda gal, or she wants to live it up on the weekends. 

For the classic girl who wants to get deep into conversation with you, I recommend of course sharing a meal. Not just drinks, but actually buy her dinner. Dating in the DC metro area has really dwindled down and tuned into "hanging out" so bypass that and grab dinner so you can actually get to know each other. 

A great dinner spot in the District is Hanks Oyster Bar (owned by Jamie Leeds, a member of the LGBT community). This is a go-to spot for LGBTs in DC and Virginia thanks to its multiple locations in Dupont, Capitol Hill and Old Town. 

With award-winning food and an oyster bar, you really can't go wrong. And its casual but slightly romantic ambiance provides the perfect atmosphere to get to know your date better, and the perfect location to do some activities... Or continue drinking elsewhere should you continue your evening!

For the more unconventional dater who wants to spend time with you but also dance the night away around her fellow ladies, take her to The Coven DC. Not even a year-old event, The Coven has taken off and set up shop at Smith Public Trust in North East DC the second Saturday of every month. 

This venue offers an open floor plan that has a decent size dance floor, DJ stage, long wrap-around bar for seating and, in these fall months, a patio for enjoyment. Founders Kate and Marissa greet you at the door and ensure the party keeps going long into the night. You can spend time chatting it up at the bar as well as getting a little close on the dance floor.

Which ever you choose, I'll leave you with three Dos and Don'ts to ensure the perfect first date success:


- Hug, hold hands, open doors, in other words, show her affection. No need to be overbearing but if you're into your date, make sure she knows it!
- Pick up the check. If it's your idea and you had a great time, pick up the check to solidify and show it. When she offers to split or grab it, simply suggest she plan and pay for the next date.
- Compliment her. Seem like a no brainer but you'd be surprised how easily a "date" can feel just like friends hanging out to lesbians. Send a few genuine compliments her way so there is no confusion.


- Talk about your ex. This should be plastered to every lesbian's forehead just so we all don't mistakenly forget it. Too often do exes get brought up on first dates, and for far too long of the overall conversation. Some topics are unavoidable, but move on and don't dump all your ex baggage on date one. We all have it, resist the urge to word vomit it all up to the girl you've been vibing with for the last week!
- Ask if she ever hooks up on first dates. Not only does this make it look like you are just looking to get some, it also makes the date a tad uncomfortable. Leave some mystery out there for the end of the night and find out for yourself.
- Make her do all the work. This is a two person date, so make it a two person conversation as well. If you are shy or timid, possibly look up a few great questions to ask someone and keep them in your memory bank for when conversation gets slow.


Hank's Oyster Bar: 1624 Q St NW,
Washington, DC
Website | Facebook

The Coven DC: At Smith Public Trust 3514 12th St NE, 

Washington, DC 

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